Black Vs White

Omg I think I've just attained enlightenment. I so need to blog.

I was so tired studying for Chemistry. It was already 12 and I freaking have another chapter to go, plus my Progress Report which I have yet to remember what to say. I decided I needed a dose of fresh air.

So I grabbed my handphone, plugged in the earphone, walked out to the balcony and started flipping through all the different radio stations.

*gasp* I heard the Bleach song on Fly.fm.

Anyway that was out of topic.

I listened, I closed my eyes and I thought, and so much went through my mind.

Whoops. It suddenly struck me. I read Pison's blog. I read Mei Yueh's blog. I read my Nanny's blog. I read Elizabeth's blog. I read so many other blogs. It made me think.

And, and I realise. I realise that, that omg I am happy. XD

You know what, it's so complicated I don't even know what I'm feeling anymore. LOL. I'm just so happy. I'm going to do what I want to do. Because I ain't competing with no one except myself. I don't need to be the best student or anything.

I don't know how to say it omg. The thing is, right now, I am going to do what I want to do and I don't really mind if I don't get full marks (or almost full marks) in my Chemistry test tomorrow because I have been studying it all night and omg I just realise what Nanny said makes complete sense because I've been doing my best all my life, studies isn't everything in life and hell, I don't even know why am I pushing myself so much. Omg omg omg. And I also realise that Mei Yueh is right because I am not dumb just because I can't do some Chemistry or Calculus question. I just take a longer time to understand some things. And Pison is right because there are different kinds of strength and I'm a strong strong girl even though I kinda cry out of the blue sometimes but oh what the heck I'm surviving till today. How come I never really realise all that? Gosh.

Someone slap me before I faint out of happiness. XD

I just hope it lasts. =P I need to keep reminding myself because for some reason I tend to forget.