Black Vs White

The funeral of late Nublan Zaki was this morning.

I didn't know him, but he'll be greatly missed by all of us. Perhaps, some of us, like me are affected by his death despite not knowing him - there's just some connection because he was from Intec, he was actually one of us.

God bless his soul. The news on the Star Online here.

***************

Yesterday I almost killed myself. I turned the whole house upside down because I thought I lost my wallet AGAIN. For the third time. And at HOME! How can anyone lose it at HOME?? And the thought of my newly made IC - less than a month old - lost again. I almost had a heart attack and died.

Anyway I found it and so I live.

And who would have thought that karaoke-ing in Melaka is more expensive than in Sunway? >.< Oh and I lost my voice again. *coughcough* Because it's a tiny farewell for Michelle who is going to UTAR Kampar. Just the four of us, and I could swear every person who walked past our room turned their heads. XD

I'm tired.

*yawns*

Angels and Demons was AWESOME! Awesome awesome awesome!! Who said it's boring?? XD



Outing with Jyi today was satisfying considering how long ago it has been since I last saw her. And as always, she just kept going on about how I have gained weight. >.<

Do you know how it feels like when you just can't seem to find any of your friends who are actually still single anymore and you are more and more alone at the single's table?

I just got news that a pretty close friend of mine is no longer listed as single. Which I pretty much predicted already, given the events that led up to it. And I am really happy for her. Of course I am happy for her.

I mean, alright I felt a little sting inside. But that's not it.

But do you know how frustrating it gets for me when I really wanna catch that new movie out in the cinemas and I just just can't seem to find ANYONE to go with me because everyone else is going with their certain someone else. No I don't hate all you couples, I am happy for you, but I am frustrated for myself because it's so hard to go to the movies these days. And no please don't ask me to be the lamp post, I have been one long enough and the light is almost going off.

I can't really restrict it, but everytime I go out with certain girl friends of mine, and try to have a girls night out (considering how single I am) the bf pops up. I get it that they wanna spend all the time together and that the boyfriend should get along with the girlfriend's friends as well. Okay maybe I haven't been completely honest when I say I completely don't mind (although the fact is that he pops up EVERY SINGLE TIME), but come on. I'm alright with it, but can't we have a girls night out? For once. Certain things, I really just wanna talk about to my girl friends, not the boyfriends as well. So really, I don't mind but sometimes I do, a little?

And then when I finally found someone to go with me (the movie), she has to (as always) tell me she can't go. WITHOUT the courtesy of messaging me personally and apologizing. I am pissed alright, but what else do I expect? It happens ALL the time babeh. Apparently I'm just someone to ffk to if you know what I mean.

Of course, I don't hold grudges for long and soon enough I am going to forget all about it before someone decides to ffk me again.

Well thankfully enough someone else asked me. Someone single and still thinks of me despite her exams. I LOVE YOU. Just in time to take away all my pek chek-ness. And so I get to go to the movies again.

And of course, Mich was a dear to decide to spend the evening with me (and not her bf) today. I feel really bad, but well, since she said okay, I'm okay. *grins* I FEEL BAD OKAY, I do.

There's one thing bugging me for some time already, and I feel that I should do whatever that is I feel I need to do. But sometimes (despite what I learnt from Proposal Daisakusen) I totally need the timing. But it's bugging me. You know how there are things that you really think you should do and you really want to but you don't feel it is the right time to do it, and it just keeps you worrying that when the time comes, you wouldn't want to do it anymore? It's totally now or never, but.. =.=" There's always the but.

I woke up today with the sole of my feet stung by a bee while I was asleep. AND my skin is peeling off for some reasons.

I am almost done with GG. And I am totally touched by how Blair felt for Chuck. What am I going to watch after GG? >.<

Need to sleep. It's 3.46 a.m and my bedtime for the past few days have been more or less at this hour. *yawn*


You know how when you look at photos, you tend to look at yourself first to see if you're looking good? And when you're in love, you no longer look at yourself. You look at the both of you.

Facebook is totally lagging. In my case at least. Each time I leave it idle and come back to check the home page, stuff like "Show 231 new posts" appears and when I click on it, I see all the unnecessary stuffs like you know, the same old quizzes. (Again? And it seems like the season for "How well do you know so-and-so" quizzes lately) I mean, they never stop. Not that I couldn't stand it, but it's making facebook pretty damn boring.

So I've been spending my time watching Gossip Girls which I have been waiting for since forever. Do you know I love Chuck Bass? And I dream to own a closet of shoes, really. And every single piece of dress, tops, and whatever in the whole wide world. No thanks to the scandals though. >.<

Classes ended last Thursday and the next class will be on next Wednesday so I've ran back home. Seriously, I've come to a point where I can't stay in Cemara for a second if there's no one around, and I know that with 6 days off, no one would be around. It gets depressing. No I'm serious. Call me a baby, but I can't be there alone. I keep remembering things I shouldn't be thinking about and I just couldn't do it alone. I wouldn't mind staying in Cemara during my first year there maybe, but not anymore. I never thought I would be running back home this much. Funny, but I needed to think for my own well being. It gets pretty expensive you know. 28 bucks to travel to and fro.

Now, what do you suggest I do when I finish Gossip Girls? >.<

I totally HATE summer.

And I suddenly felt the need to stay in touch with some of my old friends that I hardly contact anymore. It's another 3 months before I leave. Hmm. I so need to write down a list of people I need to meet before leaving. =)

As I was clearing away all the junks on my table (because I realised I needed space to eat >.<), throwing away all the unwanted papers, (loads of them), magazines, whatnot, I came a across the book I used in my first semester. Oh yea, the black one I always carried around. ^_^

I flipped to see if there was anything important in it, or I would dump it away too.

Some maths and algebra notes. Some drawings I did when I was bored. Oh the drawing I attempted - of the guy I had a crush on. =P Which didn't look anything like him. At all. Hahah okay maybe the hair. Messy. XD

Drawings of little fishes. Cute. XD

The calendar page. So many tiny little circles. My birthday, dad's birthday, my siblings, some of my old classmates', some of my new classmates. Then I noticed some dates I did not circle.

How could I not have noticed or got to know these people then, and now they have become among the most important people in my life? How did I miss them? I searched for a red pen, none. Took a colour pencil and drew heart shapes on their birthdates. =)

That book is of not much use to me now, but it's definitely for me to keep. ^_^

I saw a red card, sadly, abandoned at a corner of my desk, among the many huge books. And sad to say, Mr Cockroaches and his family came and nibbled parts of the card. >.< But I opened it and saw the farewell messages my friends wrote to me. Lisa, sorry I did not think of you ALL the time since I came here (really LOVED sitting behind you in class) and urm, do you still wanna push my head? XD

Ah the things that made me smile. =)

Today I smell like cake + sprite + grape juice + flour + I don't know what else. Even after I took a bath. One hell of a crazy night. When was the last time I got so dirty? XD I took my bath three times today. Washed my hair three times. >.< My hair still have that weird smell.

It was extremely nice standing in the shower today. I almost didn't wanna get out. =P


What a day. *yawn*

Goodnight people! =)

I dragged myself out of bed this morning, got dressed, and went for my first day of work dengan semangat yang berkobar-kobar.

I waited for the manager to come, for half an hour.

The manager came and said, "Sorry, I talked to my boss and he told me that we can't hire you because you're only here for 2 months. I tried to call you but I couldn't get you. Sorry."

*stares at the manager in disbelief before snapping back to life*

I told him it's okay and walked away, thinking if I should laugh or get frustrated.

FML betul lah.

I came back here from Melaka, made an Eon Bank account for work cause the manager said so, and now I got "sacked" on my first day of work.

And I am stuck here! With nothing to do!!!! I could have stayed in Melaka till SUNDAY! >.<

I'm officially a dumbass. FML

It is happening again.

I can't sleep.

I am tired. But I can't sleep. >.<

I'm finally back from BTN. It was much better than I expected, really. In fact, it was actually kinda fun. =)

I didn't know the guy in my Literature class who was always so quiet can be so funny at times. And I really like my LDK group. =P

Unpacking. Done. *takes a deep breath and slumps onto bed*

I just can't help noticing the changes in myself and people around me. A year has done so much to us. Some things I really miss. And regrets always come with it.

So I came back and checked my inbox that was abandoned for five days. Guess what? I got rejected from Wisconsin. >.< *speechless*

Whatever. I'm going somewhere else anyway.

I so need to find something to occupy myself with.